Relationships – An understanding

Over the years, we have been subjected to movies, serials, family drama and many more to invite us into being in a relationship. Why do we need a partner in our life?

The need of a relationship of man and women or of the same sexes lies in the part of the individual. We cannot be alone for a long time and live in a society of differences. To have a partner who can listen to us, be with us and support us in our life makes a relationship necessary.

Marriage is only a part of the relationship but it is not the need in today’s age. We have many reasons to be married, security, fidelity, legal needs and more importantly a social status for the self. When these relationships are fulfilled one presumes that marriage is the best way to be in a relationship. But is that enough?

To be in a long lasting relationship, one has to be prepared for the challenges and the differences that the other will bring to the table. There are different aspects of a male and a female in a relationship and also in the same sex relationships, the need is the same.

The male personality in the relationship is what holds the union together from a security and financial role. The male personality brings forth the dominance and decisions that the union would need to take for different aspects in life. These personalities are more of the logical and methodical thinking, they are not very emotional and have a very pragmatic approach to life.

The female personality is a care taker and ensures the surroundings of the union is maintained for the emotional and mental serenity. These personalities are emotional, sensitive to talks and touch and have a more heart than head approach to life.

These personalities may exist in both the individuals in a relation but would have a dominated personality that would make them the male or the female personality in the relationship.

Understanding the personality would make the relationship more strong as one would realise their position in the relationship and could work with the other appropriately. We have a lot of other reasons for a person to want to be in a relationship but some of them are not as important as those mentioned above.

We have to look at a relationship as a need for a person to want a partner who can share all their secrets, their thoughts, their dreams and their physical needs without having to succumb to changing their core self. This is the basic need of a relationship and helps the individuals grow in their personality and their relationship too.

A person seeks another for the simple reason of security and comfort. Security for the materialistic and emotional support; and comfort for the one who can strengthen them in times of stress and anxiety.

When these two basic needs are met the bond of the relationship begins and starts to take shape. The next part of the relationship is to sustain and keep it lasting for time or “until death do us apart” scenario.

The maintenance of the relationship is an effort that both the individuals need to put forth to ensure there is harmony. This would entail helping the other with moral, emotional and physical support during the journey. It is not more of the male or less of the female support that makes a relationship, both have to equally contribute to the relation with their personality contributing to the responsibility and maturity required for the relation to last a lifetime or multiple lifetimes (as per the individual beliefs of reincarnation or life after death).

Each step in a relation would be a challenge to the one who is not prepared to understand the core of the relation and what it was formed for. Love is a drop in the ocean of a relation, the maturity of both individuals, sense of appreciation and more importantly the dependence on the other makes the relationship strong.

A relationship between friends would mean there are boundaries that one would keep in interacting with the other and the same applies to a love relation or a relation of benefits.

So why have a close relation when one would have friends to complete the need of social dependability?

The human body is unfortunately not made of the mind only and also has a body to support. The sexual needs of the body have to be addressed and the relationship formed is a core of the sexual needs of both the individuals. If this was possible among friends and there was an understanding of non-commitment then it would have worked among friends of the same or opposite sexes but we are humans and are selfish, we want things that cannot be shared. Especially, when we are in a relationship we treat the other half as our self and do not like to share them with anyone else. This gives rise to the need of fidelity, being in a monogamous and committed relationship. This bond of commitment with the two individuals gives the security and continuity required for the relationship to last the lifetime.

Understanding the mental and physical needs of the individual is key to keeping a relationship to last for a lifetime. Sometimes, the needs are met and over a period of time the two grow out of each other and do not see a need to be in a relationship, committed or not. The separation is evident as the beginning of the relationship was not clearly defined for each of the individuals to be together for the lifetime.

Breakups, divorce are some of the terms we use when the relationship turns sour and has an outcome of ending without continuity. The reasons for this will be shared in the next article to understand why a relationship breaks.

Relationships - A Need or Greed!

We are human beings born with the need of being closely associated with another being. It could be our parents, our siblings, friends or associates. But we have to be associated with someone. We have studied, played, worked,  laughed and cried with the people we are associated with and feel close to.

Over the last few decades, the machine has taken over this need and is distancing us from the people we chose to make us feel happy or smile. Our talks are now chats, our meetings are virtual, our relationships are online and our smiles are now smileys. This void is giving us the feeling of loneliness, even though we have a 1000 friends on facebook we are still yearning for time to smile with a single person. We may be sharing a lot of smiles, but we are yearning to smile in the real world.

When the distance is created we are creating a void within our self and this leads to more complicated lifestyles. Our mental disorder leads to physical ailments and there on to extreme behaviours. The blue whale game is the recent example. While the game is only the tip of the iceberg, there is a bigger problem in hand. Why are we attracted to the online web and get entangled in it where we stop to miss the real world and live an empty life.

How do we cure this problem?

We need to understand the base of a relationship and why we want to participate in the process. It can be with your parents, siblings, a lover or spouse, friends or colleagues in your work place. The disturbance in a relationship is caused when there is less respect for the individual and there is a drain of the love that is being received.

A relationship is on the basis of respect and sharing of love, not of asking for love. Be it with a relative or with an unknown. The more we learn to give in terms of time, attention, respect and trust, the stronger the relationship builds and that is the key to it.

Sometimes, our greed of selfishness is what causes the relationship to break down and make dents which lead to a broken relationship.

How do we understand where to draw the line?

TART strategy - Time Attention Respect Trust

Time - When you are with a person face to face, dedicate the time to the person for all that the said moment is worth.

Attention - Give the person all the attention that you can allow the person to make them feel comfortable in your presence

Respect - Respect them for their views, not necessary that you have to agree to it. But it is their thinking and we should choose to agree that we can have opposing views to a single point.

Trust - Trust your instincts to make the right decision when you are here and allow you to trust the person with the resources available to you and give them an opportunity to trust you too.

Not a process that can be incorporated in a day but we are creating the path for us to develop it better.

Connect with us to attend our 1 day workshop on building relationships to make this possible for you to achieve happiness in your relationship (Friendship, Marriage, Business, Parent-Child, Personal)

Life is for a smile, let's get some in our relationship too

Why

I walk in the park and see many people. The faces tell me a story and I like to read these stories. 

The stories are regular features of hate, love, depression, sadness, remorse and the other parts of life. In one of my walks, I sat by a bench and was in my own thoughts when an elderly gentleman came to sit next to me. He was in pain and I could read the story on his face. Duty bound and looking to better the world, I ventured to speak with him.

"Good evening, sir! Isnt this a beautiful place to be"

I dont think he wanted to speak and shared a mute reaction to my statement. I also did not venture further as it was his choice to be on his own and I should respect it.

I sat there on my own realising we are the cause of the why!

Why did this happen to me? Why am I suffering? Why can't good things happen to me? Why am I always the loser?

The "why" in our lives is a place that we are not able to remove./We chose to make ourselves the victim rather than the winner. By questioning our situation at that moment, we forget to understand the universe and it's creation. And since we fail to understand the universe, we fail to understand ourselves.

The question we could be asking ourselves is, why was I born? why did I get to breathe life? why did the sun rise from the east and set in the west? why do plants have veins on their leaves? why do I have veins inside my skin?

Let your mind wander to the nature of truth and realisation. There is a lot, you and I can learn from nature and we can have ourselves associated with such beauty that we would realise how nature forms the part of our universe. In finding the answers to these questions, we will be better equipped to find the answers of life.

No, we do not have to become a sage or a sanyasi or wander off into the jungle to find the answers. All we need to do it take the time in the course of lives to notice people around us, notice the environment around us. See how life builds itself around us. We are part of the universe, there is a reason for our birth and our lives. Find the purpose of your life, and keep asking the why till you have a suitable answer to it.

The pursuit of the Why will bring you to the feet of your problems which you can dust and walk along with a smile.

Remember, all you need to do is ask, "Why?"

Do I have a laugh within me?

I love watching comedy shows, I love attending stand-up comedy, I love these romantic/ thriller/ action movies/soaps/ serials.

It's common to like something that come son the TV or attend a movie or play or festival of a genre. What we fail to understand is why we like these genres.

The different genres showcase a part of us that we miss, we want it in our lives but are too scared to follow it through. We may need some action, love, relationship, hate, anguish in different forms but are never able to make it possible.

Do we try to ask ourselves this question? What is i t that I would like to do in my life? Why would I spend time listening to songs that are depressing or movies that make me miserable. Knowing or unknowingly we always put ourselves into harms way by pushing the envelope too far. We are selves are not able to gauge the damage we do when we align ourselves to the ego of our body.

The soul has no attachment to the material side of life hence is always happy. The body has the sense of anger, frustration, depression, happiness, joy, sorrow, etc. These emotions are a result of our body creating a sense of loss in our minds and that doesn't allow us to control our environment. When we loose our control we create an imbalance in our emotions. This leads to that emptiness to be filled with your spike in anger, frustration, depression, etc.

The body is the second signal that will tell you how your emotions hurt you. Most cancer patients have an imbalance of anger within them. Thyroid and lower back patients are ones with submerged resentment. There are many more such examples which I will share in the next readings for your reference.

The point is, do we ask ourselves whether we are leading a soul fulfilment life or a life of mine and yours?

Do we do things that make us happy or give glory to our ego to build its esteem?

Questions we can ask the person in the mirror will give us a standing ovation when the gates of heaven open and we have to walk through.

Love – An understanding

"I love you"

"I cannot live without your love"

"Your love makes me complete"

These are some of the most common phrases used to describe love. Yet we see a lot of divorce and separation taking place in the world and people around us.

Do we truly understand the meaning of this word,"LOVE"

As per the dictionary love means:

noun

noun: love; plural noun: loves

1.       a strong feeling of affection.

·         a strong feeling of affection and sexual attraction for someone.

·         affectionate greetings conveyed to someone on one's behalf.

·         a formula for ending an affectionate letter.

2.      a great interest and pleasure in something.

3.      a person or thing that one loves.

4.      (in tennis, squash, and some other sports) a score of zero; nil.

It has become as empty as its meaning, nothing specific and not a direct guide to what the meaning actually is.

The origin of the word is from a German and old English word lufu, which means "desire".

From the definitions shared above we should ask our selves what is the meaning of I love you as a statement. I desire you, I cannot live without your desire, your desire completes me.

Which would seem so worthless for the love to exist forever, the marriage or the relation is bound to end when love has such a shallow interpretation.

Love is about giving and sharing. Not about wanting or taking. A relationship only will last the test of time when there are two or more people who would want to keep giving love to the other instead of being desirous of an expectation from the other.

Love is then a beautiful word that can create ripples in our relation and the person who we want to share the emotion with. It also makes us conscious of who we should love and care for.

LOVE 7, spend 7 minutes of your day telling the person who you think you love, why you love them. It is less than a percent of the time in a day and yet these 7 minutes are going to make the change that your relation has a need for. The choice is in your hands.

You can make the difference by just letting the love flow from a receiving to a giving. From a wanting to an offering. The river flows towards the person and you will see a change in your life. The life that you dreamt of, the love that you wanted by giving the love without any expectation of want.

Love 7 will be your help to change the way you make your life and your relation so much better.

Why should I be a spiritual being?

A normal question that is asked by the multitudes is, “why should I be spiritual?” or “what is spirituality?”

It is explained with simplicity in a single statement, how would I want to be treated if I were to expect others to treat me in the same way?

Some of us without being aware are already following spirituality and are spiritual in our own nature. We do not have to visit temples, churches, mosques or any other religious place to be related to divine and follow divinity. We are beings blessed with the abundance of knowledge and power to make the best of ourselves. See the world around you that you live in and you will see the blessings that you are cherished with.

There is a lot of abundance in the fact of we as beings and spirituality have a connect. While we cannot see or feel the divine in the flesh, many of us have experienced the works of the divine in our daily lives. We have seen the bliss of nature and the acts of god without even realizing it.

Spirituality is very much different to religion, some have an understanding that spirituality is religion. Fortunately, none of the founders of the said religions ever mention or aim to create the religion that is being propagated and followed today. We are lambs of society. For we live in what we are told to believe and not what is being understood to be the truth. Those who chose to reason and understand the ways of god are the ones who are shunned and pushed away till it is a little too late to appreciate them when they were alive.

In simple, spirituality is the search of the divine within one’s self. The truth of the yin and yang within each of us. We do not have to compare or relate to anyone but our very own self. The true spiritual being is independent of all thoughts, words, actions and deeds. He/She lives in the bliss of making themselves happy without selfishness, greedy, bias, hate or treachery. There is nothing to want more than satisfaction in what they have or what they get.

If you find yourself in the description above, you can believe that you are spiritual and are part of the process where the awakening is happening for you and the people you associate with. Be happy and glorious in your existence and provide the space for the others around you to grow in their bliss and happiness. For then, we all would be spiritual, with or without knowing.

When Smiling in Bad times?

There is something about death, that sends shivers down our spine. We mourn and show case our sorrows with the passing of a loved one or acquaintance. Even though we are very well aware that we all have to pass away one day and yet we showcase a surprise to the event.

Birth is greeted with a smile but death is turned to a frown. I have asked this question to a number of people and have been given a number of reasonable answers like, “We will miss the person and their company”, “He/she was so young and was such a good child” and “The passing of the person is a mourning process for the family and friends”.

There is a thought that caused a break in me following these same principles and it goes something like this. We are always happy when something good or happy happens to us but we get depressed when things don’t go our way. Even if it is not as large as death by itself even the small things are treated with a negative and saddened thought. The loss of a job, losing a competition, getting robbed, being cheated or even yet being betrayed. These negative events make a dent in our thinking process and get us to a negative emotion which leaves us bare and frustrated to some extent. So why don’t we try to accept all these negative events in our lives with a smile?

My point is when something bad happens to you, celebrate it as it is a start of something new. Let me narrate an incident that happened to me personally and my reactions were all spontaneous and not to my understanding until much later.

In 2009, I was employed with a respectable company and out of the blue I realized I am being asked to leave the company due to downsizing and re-structuring. In the week that I lost my job, my wallet was stolen, Bike confiscated and helmet stolen. I was going through a bad incident  one after another and I did not realize why was it happening? So I stayed at home for over 2 weeks scared to step out of the house and have something else bad happen to me. In those two weeks I did some introspection and came to realize that it was my reaction to each individual event that got me more and more depressed and saddened. Let me recap step by step.

First I lost my job, I always knew the company was downsizing and I was going to be among the ones who are going to be asked to leave but yet I was saddened by it. In the dazed phase, I was travelling by the train in Mumbai and deep in thought of how my career would take shape from here was when my wallet was stolen. And I never realized it until I reached home when I went to change my clothes. A few days later, I was going to meet a friend about a job and in the process, I parked my bike at a no parking zone as I was late and had to meet him on time. I did not get a descent lead from there and on my return from his office, I was told that my bike was seized by the traffic police. I had to go the traffic police station and collect it from there. The next day I went to the mall to buy some items for the house and since I was on my bike, I felt I could leave my helmet on the bike, as no one would bother of stealing it from there. After the shopping, my assumptions were laid to test as my helmet was not to be found and none of the security guards had a clue what happened?

All these events were the cause of the reaction and process that started with me losing my job and being distracted from the rest of the world. Had I had the presence of mind and kept my calm and accepted the inevitable, there would have been no problem existent to make it worse. I would have definitely still lost my job but saved on my wallet being stolen, my bike getting confiscated and helmet stolen. One event caused three other negative events that led to more depression and me locking myself in the house for a period of recovery.

What would be preferable to be in a state of mourning or to pick up the sticks from where it had fallen and move on? Wouldn’t it be better to just turn the page and wait for a brighter day? Why create happiness? Instead, accept what is there in front of us for what it is worth and not get too attached to that event for longer than needed. Just be an observer to our own lives and move on.

Taking it back to my initial argument, why do we mourn during the death of a person? Why can we not celebrate their life for the time that they were there? Remember the good times and wipe away the bad times from our memories. It should be a thankful gesture that they are no longer required to live in a polluted world or work long hours to make a living or bow down to a boss who has no clue of your capabilities. Instead they are now resting for their time spent on this planet and hopefully are in a better place than what we currently are in.

Accept death as a matter of process and the circle of life. Nothing is permanent and nothing is forever. Life is but a matter of time for us on this planet. So while we accept life in its entirety lets think of how to accept death as well with a smile.

The Silent Goodbye

It never did matter what was said or the action done. She lay there in tears waiting for the touch of his hand and the warmth of his hug that was never to be.

It had been 3 years since they were married and had the said the "I Do". The occasion of one of the most remembered among the invited and it was a joyous occasion. Sharon had remembered the day she walked towards her husband to be, Keith and was so happy that they were going to be united in matrimony. Keith, had the smile that would have lit a thousand lights and was as happy as Sharon in having her by his side.

They had been dating for 3 years and the love had mushroomed from friendship of 8 years and then to the closeness of lovers and now fidelity in matrimony. They never thought the day would be a reality but it was to become their day of reckoning.

Keith was a man of love and had a number of flings before he knew that his search for the "one" had been futile and his best friend had always been the one. He was the one who was longing to get married but somehow did not like the girls that came into his life.

Sharon was the domestic, docile girl who was not the outgoing type. She loved to sit at home and cook more than going to restaurants for dinner with friends. She was always more lively when it came to creating things on canvas and on various crafts.

Keith and Sharon were out on a dinner when the he put the proposal during desert and she had a scoop of ice cream in her mouth which prevented her to answer or react. She had the blank face of a child when asked a question that they didnt know the answer to. She had known him for years and had a liking towards him but never professed it.

Her silence had woven a web in Keith's mind and he was not sure if he had jeopardized their friendship in the hope of sealing their relationship of friendship in matrimony. She called him 3 days later and shared her positive feedback to be by his side till death do them apart.

The reply was all that could and would make him a complete man, with love by his side, he felt the world was an oyster for him. They were married in a few months and their love was blooming with everyday that bore a new flower and a new reason for them to fall in love with each other again.

It was a love of the ages that was dawning on them. Until the fated evening....

Sharon was as usual cooking dinner and waiting for Keith to return home from work. It was the weekend and Keith loved the weekends, to enjoy with friends and family. She had prepared his favorite chicken dish and had the beers chilled to start on the evening celebrations. The mobile phone ring changed her life to be; it was her brother who was calling her and asked her where she was.

She felt weird to be asked where she was but replied she was at home and waiting for Keith to arrive. She confirmed before he could say anything that they would be meeting her on the Sunday afternoon at her mother's place for lunch. He replied he was on his way over to her place and would be there shortly.

He reached there with his mother whose eyes were sore from a lot of crying. Sharon was astonished to see her mother in the state and asked what was wrong. Her mother gestured her to sit and asked her brother to tell Sharon what had happened.

Her brother narrated how Keith was on his way home and he met with an accident. It was not his fault from the look of it but a truck driver had lost control of his vehicle and slammed into Keith's car from the back. the impact was so hard that the car was badly damaged. Keith was in the hospital and in the critical care unit.

Sharon trembled on hearing the news and rushed to the hospital with her mother and brother. She saw him there and was in tears at the state he was in. The doctors said he was on a watch for 48 hours and only god could help from here on.

She held him in her arms and stayed by him through his last breath. He didnt make it through the time given and said his goodbye in silence.

His silence was all that took for a goodbye that was otherwise said with a kiss and a hug that would crush her when he lifted her. The goodbye that he said everyday and the hello that was repeated in the same fashion, everyday for three years.

It never did matter what was said or the action done. She lay there in tears waiting for the touch of his hand and the warmth of his hug that was never to be, in the bed.

A Planned Coincidence

Has there been an instance which you felt was coincidental to what you were thinking? Or a moment when you thought of something and in due course you received it?

Was it coincidence that you meet an old friend in a restaurant that you are visiting for a first time? Is it coincidence that you meet your spouse when you knew them for years? Is it coincidence when you are working hard on your admission to the best colleges but instead get into a college where you have made the best friends for life?

What is coincidence then? or is it a plan that had been put in place when you were born or even before it? Who created this plan? Who ensured the players comply with the said plan and its success?

Questions of coincidence have long played in most of our minds but we have been avoiding it for a long time. A coincidence happens when you do not know what the future is going to be and when it happens it was just a coincidence. What if you knew the plan and saw the things happening before you; would it still be  termed as coincidence?

I have had an instance where I was longing to call on a friend for a long time and would always think about it but never really did it. And the day I picked up my phone to dial his number, I receive a call from him. And he says, he has been meaning to call you for a while but just did it. To your astonishment it was a call that was meant to happen at a time and place designated for it.

The thoughts in your mind were signals of its occurrences but it would happen only when it was meant to happen. I cannot believe that we as mortals are powerful to create such a plan of motion. I do believe that there is a greater power of strength that is guiding us through the journey called life and in this instance leading us to places that we never did imagine ourselves to be.

Often in times of stress we hear the quotes, "Just as good times dont last forever, bad times will also have a way of passing over." While it sounds motivational, the person going through the stress of bad luck in their lives would understand the situation that is and the future that lies ahead.

Its very disheartening to read in the papers or listen to the news on television when we hear of people ending their lives because of the pressures of society or life itself. Fathers and mothers killing themselves and their off springs to end their misery in this world. Why would people take such actions? Is it their destiny to die a morbid death and not see the rainbow that they were destined for? Did they not try to figure out how to see the light at the end of the tunnel?

The difficulty is in believing that everything happens for a reason and that the almighty power guiding us through this difficult times is also there to help you through it. Why then do people give up their strength in the hope of a better day?

I remember a time in my life when I was on the verge of taking my life and ending the misery but something just happened overnight where I was signaled to fight on, to get up and dust myself and run.  The night that I had thought of going through the dastardly act, a friend came by the house and forced me to join him and his wife for dinner at a local restaurant. I was very reluctant to join them being in the frame of mind to do the unthinkable.  Something inside me said I should go out with them and spend sometime. The evening was filled with memories and laughter, I didnt eat much but I did look around me and the people who entered the restaurant to have their dinner and then I would glance at my friends sitting in front of me. 

The thought, while I was at the restaurant, was of rejoice and breaking through the chains of frustration and sadness. It was like a phoenix of hope was rekindling itself within me and giving me the strength to move on. Its been 5 years since the event happened and today I can proudly say there are no difficulties that I cannot overcome with the light of hope hovering in the prayers and blessings of my near and dear ones.

I remember the day for each moment of my life and do not think it was coincidence for them to have to come at my house on a weekday to save me. It was their and my destiny to be with each other for the time and it was their presence to which I owe my happiness and joy.

I have been subject to many such coincidences in my life and many a times I fail to recognize the plan that is being followed to make me build my foundations of happiness. The times when I did turn a blind eye to it, I would be dejected and frustrated.

When I am alert and aware of the coincidental plans that happen, I see the signs that make me remember the plan that the almighty has in store for me and that I should ready for the good or the bad to come my way based on the circumstances in hand. 

Be aware, of the coincidences in your life. You may never know the plan that has already been put in place for you in the form of this coincidence!!!

In Dad we trust!

I keep listening to songs that have an ode to their mothers, the way mothers have always cared for their children and family. But I rarely hear, see or read of how great fathers are.

There are times when I am touched with my fathers love for me and my sisters. He has a weird way of expressing his love and more often than not its over a conversation of cricket, politics or just some news event. His most used phrase of talking to me during my growing up days were, "Let's have a man to man talk". Sometimes he would use the same statement with my sisters as well which I felt was weird, as it should have ideally been, "Lets have a woman to man talk" or "Lets have a Daughter and father talk". 

A mechanical engineer by profession, he excelled in what he did. His engines, as my mother would say, was his first wife. He was always interested in what he did and never worked a day in his life. If I would ever ask about the engines, he would speak about it with pride and an enthusiasm of a boy who would have just learnt of the engines and was starting his career.

He has been the envy and pride of my and my sisters life, ever since I can remember. As a child he was a little aloof and we never got to know him well but as we touched our teenage years he would always be there and speak to us as a friend.

I remember a time during my internship at a hotel and I would work from day break till the wee hours of morning, barely getting 5 hours of sleep. We never met each other for about a week or so staying in the same house. One night when I came back at about 2 in the morning, he was lying on the couch half asleep and waiting for me. I asked him what was he doing up so late and not sleeping as he had to go to work the next day. He replied with all innocence, that he missed talking to me and he had not seen me the whole week. He had stayed up till late just to have a word with me and speak to me about my well being. It was heart breaking that he would do such an act. I was dumb founded and left with no words but just appreciation and gratitude for him.

He never asked anything of life and led the most austere life. His only passions were watching cricket, playing sudoku and having his evening drink. Every birthday, we would ask him what he wanted so that we could buy it for him as a gift from his children but he always gave a blank reply. Never asked for anything but would only give.

My father was always attached to all three of his children. We would always fight with each other to say that they were his favourites and dad would only favour them more than the other. Being the only son and having two sisters, I was ofcourse the favourite child of my father, or atleast that was what I had thought about until I saw him break down on my sisters wedding. For the first time in my life, I saw my father in tears and not willing to let go of her when she was leaving. He kept telling everyone that she was his pride and had given all his love to her to make her strong and bright. I just didnt understand why would such a strong personality would break down at this event. He was happy that she was married but it saddened him that she was leaving him to be a part of another home.

In all the years, I have known dad. He was always the rock that we lay our foundations on. He was strong in thought and knew exactly what he wanted and never asked for more. He would sacrifice for the sake of his family and made sure that we always got the best of what was available or afforded. 

Growing up with him, he has become more of a friend than a father. I dont know a better friend to have than him. Sometimes, we sit and share a drink in the evening and watch his favourite sport of Cricket. The irony is that I hate the game and dont understand why the country of a billion plus people are so crazy of this sport. I still make it a point to be updated with the sport in the little way I can to share the chat with him on the sport. Its nice when he gets excited when Tendulkar makes his mark and scores his runs. In Tendulkar's peak period, dad would not watch the match if he would get out at a low score. His theory was then, that if Tendulkar performs then India would win the match. The statistics spoke a different story years later. 

A few years ago, I was holidaying with my friends in Nasik and received a call in the afternoon from my mother that dad was undergoing angioplasty because he had a 90% blockage in one of his arteries. I was stone cold on hearing it and cancelled the complete trip to make my way back to Mumbai to be with him. I was nervous and anxious to know how and what had happened. In all my life, I cant remember many days when he ever fell sick or caught a fever. He was always the healthy kind with the heart of steel. Never moved by the change of weather or location. To hear that he was going into an operation to for it made me shiver while thinking of it.

I reached the hospital that night and heard the operation was successful and that there was nothing to worry about. He slept through the night and was bright fully surprised to see me wish him well early in the morning. I for one was just happy to see him smile and look alright.

I cant seem to get enough of him, he is the Rock and the stone that the family lives around. His love is only of giving and not asking. A man strong of faith and spirit, A man with the love and respect of his peers and family, A man who would not ask for anything more than he wanted, A dad in who we trust.