Rendez-vous

Walking through a mall on a weekend in India is like going to a market for shopping these days. We have to wait for parking if we go later than 6 pm. The crowds are thronging at the food court, the few seats we get to see along the aisles are also occupied but the shops are not crowded with buyers.

It got my wife to think what would people do if there were no malls today. She asked me, "What would you and your friends do when you were in college?". My instant reply was that we would roam in our colony and take long walks to just stand a gate of the building and have a gala time of the things done or make one the scapegoat for the moment.

She was right to point that people have taken malls as the new destination to meet with friends and spend the evening or even a day. There was no charge to enter the mall and the air conditioning was free on a hot/ rainy/ cold day. The new generation has figured a better alternative to being confined to their buildings/ society / colony to spend time with friends.

Not only the young college going generations but also people of all ages are following the same principle, in note, as we went to observe. We saw the elderly in with their children and grandchildren, young couples holding hands or carrying their new borns. Office going crowd was always the most in the malls but in the groups their came with differed as we noticed.

Once we put our finger on this thought, we shared the same with some close friends and their experiences were even more interesting. Seemingly, one of them was called to the food court in a mall for an interview with an HR recruitment agency and yet another was comfortable to meet a person who her mother asked her to meet for marriage and to get to know the person. She felt that a food court in a mall is well crowded and she would feel safe in the midst of the multitude.

This was a new thought for us to think that every weekend, we too would visit a different mall in Mumbai. The distance to travel was enjoyed with some music and conversation of what happened in the week or just normal life conversations or just abusing the administration of the bad roads and upkeep of the city.

The point is we all have evolved in the way we meet and greet our friends and well wishers. The mall style has changed the way we observe the relationship with a friend or with an acquaintance. Think about it!!!

A Question of How and Why?

Its very intriguing to know how a "Kundli" can actually predict your future. The astrologer or pundit sits with the charts to the time and date of your birth and describes your past and predicts your future.

I have been attracted to this form of prediction in dire needs. Also, some friends suggested it to me, assuming that I would get a little peace to know that good times are around the corner. I cannot imagine what made me go for it, but I was amazed at the way the astrologer predicted my behaviour, my eating habits, my ailments and problems that I had in the past. I was swept off my feet with the things he spoke about me and that too with just numbers in front of him.

I came out a renewed individual with the strength to say that I will be ok and things will get better. But that only lasted for the time until my mind was set into motion of reasoning with the logic shared.

If this individual was able to see the future and predict it to the dot, would not it be cheating to know what my future would be? And if he did do such a good job at predicting the future, would not everyone be in a good place who believed in the astrologers advice? Why do we have to go through the rough phase if the mantras and rituals performed to keep us safe and happy do not work at the time of delivery? If the future is uncertain in all its beings, would not I be the one to mold it with my actions and not what the "Kundli" reads of me?

There were a ton of questions that were germinating in my mind and the roots of reasoning were digging deeper with more time spent on the topic. I kept pondering on the question of why? Do I want to know the future based on the past events and how can anyone know my future and pen it down. Is that what the almighty wanted us to do or are we cheating in the exam called Life?

The thoughts of confusion and paradox theories came to light, I spoke to many people on the said subject. Some less learned than I assumed to be and some less helpful in the logic shared. The internet was loaded with so much of information on the subject that I was getting more confused than ever. With every other site contradicting each other in the commonality of the logic behind astrology and the reasons for the sadness and deprivation of happiness for a few.

Another thought came to mind, of those who were not believers of the astrology phenomenon or even atheists and of those who would not have the yearning to know their future. How would they be making decisions in their lives? Astrology is common only in Asians and knowing the future is part of the eastern culture. People in the Western world do not believe in the said structure. Why are they having better economies and lives than some of us?

There must be something to the whole theory of life. Why do some people struggle with all their decisions and the subsequent results? Where on the other hand, we know of people who were walking on air and getting anything that they dreamed of with the least effort. The 7 year itch or "Panoti"(Hindi word for bad luck)  never reaches their doorstep but resides in the walls of your house to ensure that you get troubled for the rest of your life.

I cannot understand the future and cannot understand life, but I do know that with the more "Why" that come in my quest of understanding life. The calmer and peaceful I become, not in the knowledge that I can change something but that I will have to keep learning from what life has to offer till the day that I am breathing and alive.

The Inconsequent Logic

The door opens and I wait for the step to be, it is not what I expect but I am glad for it is made. I wait to enter the place that I will call my office. My place of learning and enduring.

Since I was a child, I was always intrigued with where my dad would go out every morning and return in the evening. Sometimes, he would let me accompany him for a while at his office to be part of his day. Being an engineer, he always had charts and matrices on his wall and spoke in an engineering lingo that I would listen to with an awe.

I lived through my childhood to wait for the day that I would be part of the brigade that was fueling the world economy into moving ahead. The work force, the employee tag, the Id card, the visiting card. The place that would make me a self accomplished individual.

It started, and I was enjoying every day. I would enter and be there to learn. I would spend more hours than necessary to learn the ways and yearned to be the best.

I ensured, I followed all the logical decisions to ensure a career path that was described in the books and magazines, I read. I was making the greens and I was doing well for myself. 

Life was going good and there were no regrets, I could now stand next to my father and say I am also part of the same work force that you have been with for the majority of your life.

But I was not happy. There was a sense of lose in me. Something was not right, I was in a good place. I had money, friends and time. What more could one ask for? Isn't that what we were taught since we were infants, that we have to be successful in life. That life is defined by the bank balance you have. Well, we may not have been told directly, but it always is part of the scale that measures ones success in life.

I had it all, yet I didnt feel successful. I was living a dream life yet I was sad from inside. Was there a need for a companion in my life to fulfill it? Was it that the job I was into was not fulfilling? Were the friends I had depressing me? I could not put my finger on it.

The missing piece evaded me for years and I kept avoiding it until it was too late. I started to do bad at work, didn't really have a healthy relationship with anyone. I missed out on the laughter and was marooned in my own head, "What is it that is getting me down?" I would constantly ask myself.

It seemed futile to even think about it and I was to give up, until one day I thought of all the "JOBS" that I did, were all logical choices that was made, there was no illogical behaviour or pattern in it. There were a lot of decisions in my life that had logic to it and very few that did not have logic.

I reversed it and started to make illogical decisions, and followed my heart instead of my head. Surprisingly, without my conscious knowledge I was getting back to being the same person I was when I started my career. My life was filled with the same enthusiasm and thrills that existed when I had just crossed the threshold of employment.

It was not the world around me that had changed, it was me that was drifting away from the rules of the world and making my own. I had lost that part of me and it was eating me from the inside.

No more was I sad or missing anything in my life. I followed my gut instinct instead of the education and logical deductions for all my decisions there on.

Today, I am in a much better place and there are opportunities that are unexplored and I can only fathom what would lie ahead.

The illogical heart was my saving grace and my redeemer. I owe my life to it!