Who Am I?

The ceiling seems like a painting of pictures and moving images that keep floating in front of me.

It is not the ceiling which is showing me the images but my mind that is wandering in the garden of its thoughts and bringing back the memories that were created from the depths of my past.

Its been a long wait to receive the answer to my question. Who am I?

I have been asking myself this question for a very long time and can't remember when this urge started. I am a successful professional and am developing my skills as I move along in life. BUT who am I?

I have been given a name, a status in society, a family to look after, a love to cherish and everything that one needs in this materialistic world to exist. But who am I?

There must be a sense of purpose to our existence, to why we were born on this planet. The understanding of our purpose is still undefined. There are different modalities and courses that one can follow but do they really have the answer to my question, who am I?

I cannot really figure it out, is there a destiny to be fulfilled? Is there a path to be found? Is there a purpose at all? Am I supposed to do something? I do not know.

I live the unanswered question and walk without a sense of purpose. The job, the work, the family love and tenderness, the friends and associates, the meetings and greetings, why are we living a life to have nothing at the end; or is there something at the end?

Science can never cheat death, Money can never render comfort, Knowledge is limitless, Understanding is misunderstood. Time is used to measure a person and not the day, Money defines your status in society and not your ability to live, skills are defined by the work you can share with others and not what you can do for your self.

Everything around me speaks of things that are external to myself. There is never a syllabus or a teaching of understanding the self, learning about me, knowing the feelings and emotions that I carry.

No government or legislation, no corporate or business house, ever looks to sell you products or services that can help you grow personally. It is always to look, feel, understand and appreciate the other person.

I still have the question, who am I? What is my purpose? Why am I here?

Do you?

The answer lies in asking ourselves questions about the past that we experienced. The learnings we took from the good and bad experiences we had, did we learn from them or sit brooding over an experience that has no possibility of a change?

The struggle of life is not with the problem but the solution.

We choose to live in the problem for as long as we can and never figure a solution to the problem. Let me cite it with an example of your understanding. We had an experience of someone hurting us emotionally or physically. Did we choose to sit and cry and contemplate ways of returning the hurt and pain without really acting over it?

The truth is we do not have to focus on the revenge but to see what was the reason for the incident to occur with the "I". How could you improve yourself such that there is a better lead into the process the next time it occurs. This will lead you to understand yourself better.

This is the first step to truly understanding what you are good at and what you need to work on to make yourself better and stronger.

The rest unfolds itself as you keep asking and questioning your reactions to each situation.

Of War and Peace

The existence of hate and jealousy has been seen since Kane and Able. The greed of what is not ours has always been the motivation of brute action and subsequent reactions of negative emotions.

We are living in the world which is powered forward by the good that is done for society but are held back by the wrong that happens around us. History has been an evidence of the ruthless nature of humans and how we are so happy when we hurt others.

In the early days, war and treachery were a part of life where the mighty were powerful and the weak were simply slaves. The change of structure happened at a slow pace where war was condemned and the weak were given the strength to exist without fear. There was a change in the perception of war.

The 20th Century saw the most gruesome of world wars and the formation of the UN council which is supposedly the mediator and the supporter for the just. Media played a major role in seeking the need for peace and sustenance in the world. The number of artists who have sung of happiness and joy, the movies which have shrieked the life out of us to understand the environment of peace as subjected to that of war and hate.

Little do we know of the daily lives of the people who wake up to the sounds of bombs bursting around them. A child who fears of loosing a limb if he were outside playing football because of the shellings. A girl who was raped by the soldiers meant to protect them. The horrifying tales of parents burying their children because the opposite side mistook them for terrorists.

War exists till today in the very backyard of our homes. We just refuse to acknowledge it. We are too involved with our daily lives to figure out the love that doesnt exist in the minds of those influencers of hate. For when will hate turn to love or when would they be a need for the lost to be found.

History has been an example and a learning for us but we simply refuse to read between the lines. War only causes casualties and more hate. Dialogue and communication with a refusal for brute force or action can amicably resolve long pending issues and make us feel more comfortable.

The happiness of a parent to see their children graduating. The happiness of a child to play in the field without the fear of being bombed. The glory of a girl to play with her tea sets and dolls. The love of a husband towards his wife. 

The beauty of love that could fill the earth is still a long stretch away. There is but a need for each one of us to work in the direction of love and giving. Our choice of No WAR but offer PEACE....

The Drive.....

It was just another day going to work or was I mistaken?

A monday morning all ready to start the week, the car engine roared and I took a deep breath to focus my attention to the week ahead. As I reversed from the garage I could faintly remember the beautiful weekend that just passed by and how I wished it were a day or two longer.

The traffic was at its peak and was at snail's pace. As I waited at the signal I saw the beggars making their rounds at each car. A woman was carrying a child, not more than 2 years, on her waist and walking from car to car begging for money. She was using the child as a tool to persuade the occupants in the car to give her money.

I looked and wandered about the child and what would be his/her plight in all of this. He would be groomed to be a thief or a beggar when he would grow up. His life was meant to be doomed from the time he/she took his/her first breath of air and started to cry. The cry would have been of pain rather than of happiness to be welcomed into the world of misery.

I sat back and thought of the children who I had met, children of my cousins, friends, acquaintances. All those children would have had been born in the same manner as the child on the street but their destiny would have definitely been different to the child in front of me. The love, care and tenderness their parents bestowed on them would be only a dream for this little one.

If fate had played its cards right, this child could have been an asset to society. He/she could have been a writer, an actor, an engineer, a doctor or any other professional but because of the bad parenting he/she was to be in the life of misery with the goons of society.

The drive didnt last long as the thought of the child kept playing in my head and made me wonder. What could I have done to make this a better place for the children of tomorrow? How could we as the elders of today work to make the city a better place for all to live in?

If we all were to make our cities, towns and villages a safe haven for children that would be a start to ensuring our children would not have to bear the same brunt or anguish that we as children may have had to endure.

The drive to make this world a better place needs to begin and start at home. Else there would never be a home left for the future generations.